有时候，我真的怀疑父母之间是否有爱情。他们整天都忙于赚钱，为我和弟弟支付学费。他们从未像我在书中读到，或在电视中看到的那样互诉衷肠。他们认为“我爱你”太奢侈，很难说出口，在情人节送花就更不可能了。我父亲的脾气非常坏，一天的劳累之后，他经常发脾气。
一天，母亲正在缝被子，我静静地坐在她旁边看着她。
过了一会，我说：“妈妈，我想问你一个问题。”
“什么问题？”她一边继续缝着，一边问道。
我低声地问她：“你和爸爸之间有没有爱情啊？”
母亲突然停下了手中的活，诧异地抬起头。她没有立即回答，又低下头，继续缝被子。
我担心刺伤了她，我非常尴尬，不知道该怎么办。不过，后来我听见母亲说：
“苏珊，看看这些线，有时候，你能看得见，但是大多数都隐藏在被子里。这些线使被子坚固耐用。如果生活就像一床被子，那么爱就是其中的线，它不会总是被看到，但是它却实实在在地存在着，爱不在表面上。”
我认真地听着，但无法明白她的话，直到第二年的春天。那时，父亲病得很重。母亲在医院里待了一个月。当他们从医院回来的时候，都面色苍白，就像他们都得了重病一样。
他们回来之后，每天的清晨或黄昏，母亲都会搀扶着父亲在乡村的小路上散步。父亲从未如此平和过，他们看上去无比和谐。小路旁有许多美丽的野花、绿草和树木，阳光穿过树叶的缝隙，温柔地照射在地面上。这一切形成了一幅世间最美好的画卷。
医生说父亲将在两个月后康复。但是两个月之后，他仍然无法独立行走，我们都很担心他。
有一天，我问他：“爸爸，你感觉怎么样？”
他温和地说：“苏珊，不用为我担心。跟你说吧，我喜欢与你妈妈一块散步的感觉。我喜欢这种生活。”从他的眼神里，我看出他对母亲深深的爱。
我曾经认为爱情就是鲜花、礼物和甜蜜的亲吻。但是从那一刻起，我明白了，爱情就像是生活中被子里的一根线，爱情在里面，使生活变得坚固而温暖。
Intentional Community
One of my intentions in life is to co-found an Intentional （Natural） Community， a collective of between 20 and 150 people， living and （through Natural Enterprises） making a living together， self-sufficiently， in harmony with nature.
The biggest challenge to achieving this， I think， is finding the people with whom to create community. In addition to having a shared purpose （the ‘intention’） those people have to have several qualities that are， I think， common in wild creatures but rare in ‘civilized’ humans：
Love： They have to care deeply about， pay attention to， appreciate and be generous to， others.
Passion： They have to be committed to their purpose， enthusiastic， energetic， positive and full of joy about life.
Trust： They have to have the courage， faith in human nature and self-confidence to trust others.
Strength： They have to be emotionally strong， not needy.
Self-sufficiency： They have to be able to self-manage， self-motivate， self-organize and think critically for themselves.
Honesty： They have to be honest to a fault， but tactfully so they don‘t hurt others.
Intelligence and Curiosity： They have to care about how the world works and how to make it better， and willing and able to understand.
Sensitivity： They have to be attentive， open， perceptive， aware， responsive.
Imagination and Creativity： They have to be able to see things other than as everyone else does， and how they might be.
Responsibility： They have to be willing and able to be responsible for their own actions and inactions， and those the people they love.
Expressiveness： They have to be able to communicate well， orally， in writing， and with their bodies.
In the natural world these are survival skills. Without them， you can’t stay alive， can‘t stay healthy， or won’t want to. I sense that that is why wild creatures live in Now Time， profoundly aware of every movement， loving life and every experience it brings.
My Let-Self-Change project is to try to engender in myself as many of these quality as possible， as deeply as possible， without constraint or reservation. I am trying to love everyone. I am trying to become a better person. I am trying to become a model for others， because I believe that is the only way we can make the world a better place.
But so many of us lack these qualities. In this terribly world we see an epidemic of hatred， jealousy， possessiveness， low self-esteem， neediness， dependence， incoherence， greed， selfishness， superficiality， insensitivity. In a healthy world where a few people lacked a few of these qualities， the rest could get together to help and heal those who were suffering. But what do you do in a world where seemingly the majority are suffering from these negative， soul destroying incapacities？ We can‘t help everyone.
So if you want to find some people who share your purpose and have most or all of the eleven essential qualities above， to create an intentional community， a working model for the rest of the world， what do you do？ In an earlier article I suggested that we might use Open Space， bring together by carefully-crafted invitation a large forum of people on the same quest， to interact and， through conversation， self-organize into fledgling Intentional Communities that would really work.
But even if we did that， we would then have the practical challenge of finding attractive， affordable， uncrowded natural places where these communities could be built. No easy task！
And then the other evening it struck me： We don’t need Open Space to convene people on this quest， nor do we need to find land for them to found communities. The tool and the place to do all this already exists， in Second Life. There are already thousands of people in Second Life （SL） exploring， actively looking for something that is missing in their lives， looking to meet new people. Sure， a lot of them are dysfunctional， negative， damaged， and lacking in the eleven qualities bulleted above. But a significant number of SLers are extraordinary people， and， I think， potential partners in Intentional Community.
