“Don't interrupt,”he begged, squeezing her hand.“I like you because I have those same qualities in me and like begets liking. I realize you still cherish the memory of the godlike and wooden-headed Mr.Wilkes, who's probably been in his grave these six months.But there must be room in your heart for me too.Scarlett, do stop wriggling!I am ****** you a declaration.I have wanted you since the first time I laid eyes on you, in the hall at Twelve Oaks, when you were bewitching poor Charlie Hamilton.I want you more than I have ever wanted any woman—and I've waited longer for you than I've ever waited for any woman.”
She was breathless with surprise at his last words. In spite of all his insults, he did love her and he was just so contrary he didn't want to come out frankly and put it into words, for fear she'd laugh.Well, she'd show him and right quickly.
“Are you asking me to marry you?”
He dropped her hand and laughed so loudly she shrank back in her chair.
“Good Lord, no!Didn't I tell you I wasn't a marrying man?”
“But—but—what—”
He rose to his feet and, hand on heart, made her a burlesque bow.
“Dear,”he said quietly,“I am complimenting your intelligence by asking you to be my mistress without having first seduced you.”
Mistress!
Her mind shouted the word, shouted that she had been vilely insulted. But in that first startled moment she did not feel insulted.She only felt a furious surge of indignation that he should think her such a fool.He must think her a fool if he offered a proposition like that, instead of the proposal of matrimony she had been expecting.Rage, punctured vanity and disappointment threw her mind into a turmoil and, before she even thought of the high moral grounds on which she should upbraid him, she blurted out the first words which came toher lips—
“Mistress!What would I get out of that except a passel of brats?”
And then her jaw dropped in horror as she realized what she had said. He laughed until he choked, peering at her in the shadows as she sat, stricken dumb, pressing her handkerchief to her mouth.
“That's why I like you!You are the only frank woman I know, the only woman who looks on the practical side of matters without beclouding the issue with mouthings about sin and morality. Any other woman would have swooned first and then shown me the door.”
Scarlett leaped to her feet, her face red with shame. How could she have said such a thing!How could she, Ellen's daughter, with her upbringing, have sat there and listened to such debasing words and then made such a shameless reply?She should have screamed.She should have fainted.She should have turned coldly away in silence and swept from the porch.Too late now!
“I will show you the door,”she shouted, not caring if Melanie or the Meades, down the street, did hear her.“Get out!How dare you say such things to me!What have I ever done to encourage you—to make you suppose……Get out and don't ever come back here. I mean it this time.Don't you ever come back here with any of your piddling papers of pins and ribbons, thinking I'll forgive you.I'll—I'll tell my father and he'll kill you!”
He picked up his hat and bowed and she saw in the light of the lamp that his teeth were showing in a smile beneath his mustache. He was not ashamed, he was amused at what she had said, and he was watching her with alert interest.
Oh, he was detestable!She swung round on her heel and marched into the house. She grabbed hold of the door to shut it with a bang, but the hook which held it open was too heavy for her.She struggled with it, panting.
“May I help you?”he asked.
Feeling that she would burst a blood vessel if she stayed another minute, she stormed up the stairs. And as she reached the upper floor, she heard him obligingly slam the door for her.
Chapter 20
As the hot noisy days of August were drawing to a close thebombardment abruptly ceased. The quiet that fell on the town was startling.Neighbors met on the streets and stared at one another, uncertain, uneasy, as to what might be impending.The stillness, after the screaming days, brought no surcease to strained nerves but, if possible, made the strain even worse.No one knew why the Yankee batteries were silent;there was no news of the troops except that they had been withdrawn in large numbers from the breastworks about the town and had marched off toward the south to defend the railroad.No one knew where the fighting was, if indeed there was any fighting, or how the battle was going if there was a battle.
Nowadays the only news was that which passed from mouth to mouth. Short of paper, short of ink, short of men, the newspapers had suspended publication after the siege began, and the wildest rumors appeared from nowhere and swept through the town.Now, in the anxious quiet, crowds stormed General Hood's headquarters demanding information, crowds massed about the telegraph office and the depot hoping for tidings, good tidings, for everyone hoped that the silence of Sherman's cannon meant that the Yankees were in full retreat and the Confederates chasing them back up the road to Dalton.But no news came.The telegraph wires were still, no trains came in on the one remaining railroad from the south and the mail service was broken.
Autumn with its dusty, breathless heat was slipping in to choke the suddenly quiet town, adding its dry, panting weight to tired, anxious hearts. To Scarlett, mad to hear from Tara, yet trying to keep up a brave face, it seemed an eternity since the siege began, seemed as though she had always lived with the sound of cannon in her ears until this sinister quiet had fallen.And yet, it was only thirty days since the siege began.Thirty days of siege!The city ringed with red-clay rifle pits, the monotonous booming of cannon that never rested, the long lines of ambulances and ox carts dripping blood down the dusty streets toward the hospitals, the overworked burial squads dragging out men when they were hardly cold and dumping them like so many logs in endless rows ofshallow ditches.Only thirty days!
