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第17章

Madame Cui ordered a farewell dinner to be prepared in the Resting Pavilion. It was late autumn, and although the sky was cloudless, the wind was rustling and the yellow leaves were everywhere. The colors and growing signs of winter gave the evening a note of melancholy. Yingying was sad, knowing that she would be saying goodbye to Zhang in only a few hours. She wished for time to stop.

Though she normally dressed up to see Zhang, this night she decided against it. She put on a casual dress and wore no makeup. Hongniang was surprised to see her young mistress in such a state.

“Why are you dressed so casually, Miss Cui?”

“Women dress themselves up for their lovers, but I am about to bid mine farewell. I don’t even know when I will see him again. I’ve been crying all day, how am I supposed to dress up tonight?” The two girls entered the dining room together. Madame Cui was asking the abbot and Zhang Sheng to take their seats and instructed Hongniang to fill their cups.

“Come closer,” she said to Zhang. “You are now a member of the family, so please don’t be timid and shy away from others. I already betrothed my daughter to you. You’re going to attend the imperial examination in the capital and I’m here to see you off. Your future career has an important bearing on Yingying’s happiness. Don’t let her down. We hope to welcome a top scholar back.”

“Thank you for your trust. I have faith in my ability. I have been studying for many years. I will pass the exam and get a post in the government.”

Knowing that Yingying hadn’t had her breakfast, Hongniang tried to persuade her to have some soup, but Yingying could not eat. She didn’t care about Zhang’s rank or wealth, all she wanted was to lead a peaceful and tranquil life with the man she loved.

And she was angry that these were the things that would separate her from Zhang. Zhang felt the same. He sat at the table, keeping his head low to hide his tears. But Yingying, who always paid close attention to him, noticed his sadness.

When dinner was over Madame Cui went back to the temple, and the abbot approached Zhang.

“I’ll keep an eye on the results. When you win the first place, you should invite me to dinner for I helped in your marriage. From now on, I’m afraid I won’t be able to concentrate on my scriptures or services. I’ll be anxious to hear your good news. Take care.” He patted Zhang on the arm and then left.

“You don’t have to take my mother’s words too seriously,” Yingying told him when ever yone else had left. “I don’t care about your promotion, fame or wealth. What I want is to grow old with you. Whether or not you get the first place or promotion, please just come back as soon as possible.” She was starting to question everything: What would happen to her husband after the departure? Would he betray her?

“Have faith in me, Yingying,” Zhang swore, as if he could read her thoughts. “I will win first place and present it to you as a wedding gift.”

“My dear husband, I have nothing to present you as gift but a poem,” she took out a piece of paper and handed it to him.

Left alone, I can’t bear recalling

The dearest love cherished by you and me.

Do not repeat to your new sweetheart

Those promises you made to me!

“My love, don’t speak like that. My heart belongs to nobody but you,” He said hoping to comfort her. “I also have a poem for you.”

On whom do we depend

In this world full of departures?

To whom do I sing my tune

Except the one sharing with me my heart?

“You will be far from home,” Yingying said, trying to stop her tears. "Eat and sleep well. Pay attention to the change of season. You worry about your luck in your career and I worry about your change of heart. Don’t leave us in darkness. Write to me often. And don’t be carried away by other girls.”

“You are the only one that can carry me away,” Zhang Sheng replied.

As it grew darker outside, Hongniang finally decided to break apart the mourning couple.

“Madame has returned to the temple,” she informed Yingying. “We should head back too.”

Zhang bid farewell to Yingying with a sinking heart. The silhouette of his carriage flashed against the setting sun and disappeared among the mountains, leaving Yingying staring at his fading figure, her eyes soaked in tears and heart filled with sorrow.

Zhang had already packed so the carriage quickly took him on the start of his journey. He and his servant stayed at a small hotel in Pudong that night. The bare room only added to his depression.

“I was sleeping on silk last night, and tonight, I’m in a shabby room with broken windows and thread bare blankets. I was with her yesterday, I never foresaw this.” He sighed as he fell onto the bed, and exhausted from the day, he was soon asleep. But it was not long before he heard someone knocking at the door. Curious and confused he sleepily went to open the door.

Cui Yingying was standing there before him. Her clothes were wet with dews and shoes were covered with mud. Zhang quickly ushered her inside and bent to help her take her shoes off. “I was so worried about you that I snuck out once my mother went to sleep. I want to go with you.”

Just as they poured out their hearts, someone was knocking the door. Soldiers on night patrol found Yingying suspicious, who crossed river alone in the small hours of the morning so they chased her all the way to the small inn. Zhang Sheng was surprised to find that Yingying had changed to completely a different person who, instead of whispering her words she became articulate. The overbearing soldiers didn’t listen to her regardless of her reasons. As they were about to take her away Zhang Sheng woke up from his dream with a start.

Zhang felt lost and sad.

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