We went accordingly to Lough Lomond, one of the most enchanting spots in the whole world; and what with this remedy, which I had every morning fresh from the mountains, and the pure air, and chearful company, I have recovered my flesh and appetite; though there is something still at bottom, which it is not in the power of air, exercise, company, or medicine to remove -- These incidents would not touch me so nearly, if I had a sensible confidant to sympathize with my affliction, and comfort me with wholesome advice -- I have nothing of this kind, except Win Jenkins, who is really a good body in the main, but very ill qualified for such an office -- The poor creature is weak in her nerves, as well as in her understanding; otherwise I might have known the true name and character of that unfortunate youth -- But why do I call him unfortunate? perhaps the epithet is more applicable to me for having listened to the false professions of -- But, hold! I have as yet no right, and sure I have no inclination to believe any thing to the prejudice of his honour -- In that reflection I shall still exert my patience. As for Mrs Jenkins, she herself is really an object of compassion -- Between vanity, methodism, and love, her head is almost turned. I should have more regard for her, however, if she had been more constant in the object of her affection; but, truly, she aimed at conquest, and flirted at the same time with my uncle's footman, Humphrey Clinker, who is really a deserving young man, and one Dutton, my brother's valet de chambre, a debauched fellow; who, leaving Win in the lurch, ran away with another man's bride at Berwick.
My dear Willis, I am truly ashamed of my own *** -- We complain of advantages which the men take of our youth, inexperience, insensibility, and all that; but I have seen enough to believe, that our *** in general make it their business to ensnare the other; and for this purpose, employ arts which are by no means to be justified -- In point of constancy, they certainly have nothing to reproach the male part of the creation -- My poor aunt, without any regard to her years and imperfections, has gone to market with her charms in every place where she thought she had the least chance to dispose of her person, which, however, hangs still heavy on her hands -- I am afraid she has used even religion as a decoy, though it has not answered her expectation -- She has been praying, preaching, and catechising among the methodists, with whom this country abounds; and pretends to have such manifestations and revelations, as even Clinker himself can hardly believe, though the poor fellow is half crazy with enthusiasm. As for Jenkins, she affects to take all her mistress's reveries for gospel. She has also her heart-heavings and motions of the spirit; and God forgive me if I think uncharitably, but all this seems to me to be downright hypocrisy and deceit -- Perhaps, indeed, the poor girl imposes on herself --She is generally in a flutter, and is much subject to vapours --Since we came to Scotland, she has seen apparitions, and pretends to prophesy -- If I could put faith in all these supernatural visitations, I should think myself abandoned of grace; for I have neither seen, heard, nor felt anything of this nature, although I endeavour to discharge the duties of religion with all the sincerity, zeal, and devotion, that is in the power of, Dear Letty, your ever affectionate, LYDIA MELFORD GLASGOW, Sept. 7.
We are so far on our return to Brambleton-hall; and I would fain hope we shall take Gloucester in our way, in which case I shall have the inexpressible pleasure of embracing my dear Willis -- Pray remember me to my worthy governess.
